A Triangle with Endless Sides

I'm in a triangle that seems no matter how hard i try, i just can't get out of.  From my vantage point, this puts the Bermuda Triangle to shame.

i have a daughter who is VERY angry at her mother (my wife) for the mistakes she made in raising both our girls and is basically refusing to forgive her unless she can go back in time and fix everything. In turn, i have a wife that is VERY angry at her mother (my mother-in-law) for the mistakes she made in raising her and is basically refusing to forgive her unless she can go back in time and fix everything.

Now.  i have a mother-in-law who has tried very hard to work things out with her daughter (my wife) by trying to be apologetic for the the wrongs she committed but yet feels very victimized by her daughter (my wife) fro being so unforgiving.  From there i have a wife who has tried very hard to work things out with her daughter by trying to be apologetic for the wrongs she committed but yet feels very victimized by her daughter (my wife) fro being so unforgiving.

So, my daughter has a very hard time trying to be patient with her mother (my wife) when talking to her about ANYTHING so every conversation ultimately ends up in an argument with each blaming the other for their troubles in life.  In addition, my wife has a very hard time trying to be patient with her mother (my mother-in-law) when talking to her about ANYTHING so every conversation ultimately ends up in an argument with each blaming the other for their troubles in life.

Further, my daughter gets angry at her grandmother (my mother-in-law) for not being able to set things straight with her daughter (my wife) WHILE my mother-in-law gets perturbed at her grand-daugther (my daughter) for speaking her mind about such matters since she is giving her money to go college.

ARE YOU TIRED YET?   WAIT!!!  THERE'S MORE!!!!

Now, since this post is REALLY all about me, let's turn the story back on Our Hero (that'd be me).

Once, during a counseling session, i described the dynamics of this whole amazingly confusing relationship and how each of them looks to be to correct the behavior of the other two.  Now here's what SHE (yes, the counselor is a female) said.  "Stay out of it!" To which i calmly replied, "Easier said than done!".  Ther problem with THAT strategy is that it happens quite often that when i try to follow it, i get accused of taking one of the other person's side and am not caring about the feelings of whoever i'm am talking (or try not talking) with at the time.   Throw in that i'get accused of being uncaring, selfish and am only looking out for my own well-being when, in fact, all i'm trying to do is to "STAY OUT OF IT!"

This has been going on for years now, i tell ya, YEARS!!!!!

Some of you might think, and may even suggest, it's time that i cut my losses and move on.  i'm not allowed to do so.  My parents taught us, as well as my faith, that you marry for life.  That it really is "'til death do us part'.  I strongly believe that.  In addition, i strongly believe that with time, a LOT of prayer, and even MORE healing, this triangle will eventually become a circle.  A circle of faith.  Of love.  Of compassion. And mostly, of Forgiveness.

But i ain't holding my breath....not yet.   :)

God Bless!



laters.